Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Britney Spears Dropped as Cerebral Itch spokesperson

SAN DIEGO, May 2, 2007 As a result of flagrant noncompliance to the terms of her contact with Cerebral Itch, pop-princess and mother-of-the-year Britney Spears will no longer serve as spokesperson for Cerebral Itch, Inc. and related properties.

It appears that the final straw for Cerebral Itch was last night's surprise performance at the San Diego House of Blues nightclub. Ms. Spears performed wearing a wig of long brown hair. A move that was in direct violation of the terms in her contract that required her to remain shorn and display the well-known Cerebral Itch icon: the cross bandages. Cerebral Itch president and co-founder, Paul Chamberlain stated "To say that we didn't anticipate erratic behavior by Ms. Spears would be an understatement of cosmic proportions, but to cover up our icon with a wig and wear panties in public on the same night was just too much; we needed to get the lawyers involved."

Spears spokesperson, Gina Orr denies that Spears did this intentionally and hopes that this can be resolved quickly and amicably. But sources close to Spears claim that she never really got the humor and complexity of the Cerebral Itch brand and was only doing it in hopes the brand association would resurrect her "cool factor". "The cards confused her and made her head hurt" said a close Spears associate who declined to be identified. Another source claims that while in San Diego, Spears was in negotiations with Freedom Grill, a San Diego-based manufacturer of gas barbeque grills that can be mounted to the trailer hitch of any vehicle.

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