Friday, June 29, 2007

I can dream can't I?

The summer gives way to lazy afternoons and thoughts of whimsy, or at least that's what they say in those goddamn lemonade commercials. But if they are to be believed, then my summer daydreams kicked into high gear this morning with the release of the iPhone; causing me to wax fantastic by imagining my perfect summer day - it goes something like this:

10:06 am: wake up after 10 hours of undisturbed sleep
10:17 am: Getting the news via my new iPhone that Dick Cheney is getting impeached and will be removed from office
10:30 am: Waffles
10:57 am: Watching clip of Dick Cheney getting impeached and removed from office on my new iPhone
11:42 am: More Waffles
12:36 pm: Something that involves nudity and spouse
1:06 pm: Nap by the pool
2:03 pm: Watching clip of Dick Cheney getting impeached and removed from office on my new iPhone
2:05 pm: Buying an $85 bottle of Pinot Noir along with some Ben & Jerry's Turtle Soup and a lottery ticket to celebrate Dick going down
3:12 pm: Lunch by the pool
3:33 pm: Watching clip of Dick Cheney getting impeached and removed from office on my new iPhone
4:23 pm: More nudity and spouse
5:17pm: Watching clip of Dick Cheney getting impeached and removed from office on my new iPhone
5:19pm: Matinee of a summer movie that involves explosions, special effects and a plot that is worthy of my $10 bucks
7:45pm: Watching clip of Dick Cheney getting impeached and removed from office on my new iPhone
8:00pm: Checking lottery numbers via my iPhone browser and discovering that I in fact, just won the lottery
8:01pm: Wildly flailing about running in all directions with middle fingers waving at anything that moves screaming "I own you and you and you and you and YOU!"
8:47pm: Gaining my composure with police officers Chavez and Dean
8:53pm: Watching clip of Dick Cheney getting impeached and removed from office on my new iPhone
10:04pm: Settling into first class seat with spouse for flight to Paris with no luggage because we'll just buy new shit when we get there
10:06pm: Watching clip of Dick Cheney getting impeached and removed from office on my new iPhone
11:03 pm: More nudity and spouse
11:18 pm: Being asked to return to our seats
11:21pm: Watching clip of Dick Cheney getting impeached and removed from office on my new iPhone
11:56pm: Nodding off on spouse's shoulder softly muttering "I own you and you and you and you z z z z z z z z zzzzzzzzzzzz"

2 comments:

Sharon said...

This one belongs on your greatest hits list.

Nancy said...

6:15: checked email horoscope sucks
6:21: poured a 2nd cup of coffee.
6:30: checked out Hodgepodge web site...she is so fricken funny that english girl.
6:33: decided to check out CI blog site...
6:38: stopped laughing long enough to write this post.