Monday, February 04, 2008

Cerebral Itch SUPERBOWL XLII Recap Part II:
The Commercials

$2.7 million got you 30 seconds last night during SuperBowl LXII - some used it for good and some used it for plain un-creative oh so retarded evil commercials. Case in point, Sales Genie. Who once again thought it necessary to soil my television with their not only moronic advertising, but apparently this year they thought of being racially offensive as well. Let's see, using cartoon pandas with thick Asian accents owning a bamboo furniture store - not since Ping and Pong of the old Brady Kids cartoon have pandas been used so brazenly to stereotype - observe:

Not to be outdone on the stereotype front, Taco Bell decided mariachis with smarmy grins and mock seductive latin charm could get more people in their well lit polystyrene shitholes to destroy their digestive tracts. - observar:

Okay, now that we've discussed the worst, a quick rundown of the top Five SuperBowl XLII commercials as voted by the staff of Cerebral Itch:

  1. e*Trade both of them - (finally someone figured out how to make talking babies funny: spit-up and making fun of clowns)
  2. Career Builder - (just the right amount of macabre humor mixed with a cute f-you attitude)
  3. Glacéau Vitamin Water - (Shaquille O'Neal + jockey silks = comedy)
  4. Pepsi - (Funnier when you think of how much money they had to pay Carville to breathe the same air as jackass Dr. Frist)
  5. Audi - (Huge points not for originality, but for casting Alex Rocco as the screaming sleeper. Alex Rocco played Moe Greene in the first Godfather movie. If the license plate on the car had said "Khartoum" we would've rated it number one - look it up)
Honorable mention: Bridgestone tires - Why they didn't mow down Richard Simmons I'll never know - it would've been number one if they had)

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